What? Empowering Women Without Bashing Men?

Feminism, you’re doing it wrong. Just look at these girls being empowered to be themselves without being told how they are just held down by the patriarchy.  We just can’t stand for that! How will these girls ever learn that everything bad that ever happens to them is due to blatant sexism? You can’t tell them they can learn and do things to better themselves! How will you ever convince them that Womyn’s Studies is a perfectly marketable degree? /snark

Little Jenni would have loved this. I think she just did a back-flip in my head and somehow managed to break something. Thankfully, I don’t have to cover my inner child on my insurance and since her doctor is my head too, she can keep him.

Sure, I played with Lego’s and claimed all my brother’s building sets for my own, but this would have felt like it was really mine. Not that there’s anything wrong with all the pink and the dolls and the feathers and the ruffles, but dammit! I got tired of needing to request the ‘boy’ Happy Meal because I preferred the Hot Wheels and Lego sets to the non-articulated hunk of plastic that was an even less cool rendition of Barbie. Who decided that was fun? She just stood there and well, stood there.

My Little Ponies rode into battle alongside the Transformers! And then I braided their hair. Because I have always been both girly and tomboy. Can you say ‘target demographic’?

Kids can be mean and they are so very impressionable. I can’t tell you how many times some boy told me that I wasn’t supposed to be playing with Lego’s because those were for boys. Most days I shoot them a raspberry and go on about my business, but that wasn’t everyday. Some days I’d sulk over to the dolls and tea sets and pretend to have fun just so I didn’t seem weird. Good times!

This blog is supporting the relief efforts of Shepherd’s Hill International in the Philippines. I can personally vouch for this organization. Any money you give will go directly to the people in need.

 

How Dare You Be Attractive!

Feminists claim to be all about the empowerment of women. They claim we can have it all. We are all powerful and strong and smart and just as good as, nay, better than men.

But Heaven forbid we be pretty! It’s a travesty! A horrible injustice that someone could become CEO of a household name like Yahoo! and still a slave to the patriarchy!

Just ask Marissa Mayer who dared look beautiful and feminine in Vogue.

MarissaMayerHow dare she be a smart successful woman AND attractive! Don’t you know that to be a proper feminist one must eschew all things that are stereo-typically feminine!

When the shoot was released in August, Time magazine said it made Mayer look like she was ‘posed like a mermaid stranded on a stick of gum.’

The publication also questioned ‘is it feminist for a powerful woman to pose for a fashion magazine?’ And, ‘Is it feminist for a CEO to care about how she looks?
A commentor to CNN‘s Facebook page wrote of the shoot: ‘We fight so hard to be where we are and prove that it wasn’t our cute bodies, perky boobs or cute face that got us there. 

‘Shame on you Marissa Mayer for playing into stereotypes,’ the commenter, Anna Nicole Moose, continued.

But I thought you said I could have it all? I suppose that’s only for certain definitions of ‘all.’ I forgot to read the fine print. Victimhood status does not apply to wives, mothers, or pretty girls.

Wow. Just wow. Marissa Mayer went out there and proved that she is so much more than just a pretty face. She is playing what has traditionally been a man’s game, and she CEOs like a girl. (Yeah, I just made CEO a verb.) This should be a triumph! But alas, no.

Do they criticize her for not taking advantage of the hard-fought maternity leave? Nope. How about throwing a wrench in the flexible work/life balance of work from home Yahoo! employees? Nope.

She’s too pretty. Shame on Marissa Mayer! You aren’t a true feminist unless you completely eschew the feminine and ugly yourself up. Looking pleasing to men is the ultimate betrayal of the sisterhood, apparently.

Women and men are sexual creatures. There is no benefit to denying this. It does nothing to empower anyone.

This, courtesy of the Divine Mistress of Elsewhere, TX, is what a strong, empowered woman looks like.

Yowza! She’s gorgeous, she’s sexy, and she owns that room. She is holding all the cards, and all the power. She has every eye. She’s playful and kind. She positively exudes confident femininity.

Ladies, don’t listen to the feminists. Their movement is outdated and no longer represents the best interests of anyone, certainly not women. They don’t want to make you stronger. They want you to be a victim to support their house of cards. You can be whatever you want to be if you put your mind to it and work hard. And you can do it in designer stilettos if you want to. Or not. It’s up to you.

 

Real Women Are All Sizes, Even Skinny

I tossed the title of this post off in a comment to a friend on Facebook this morning. And although it is perfectly accurate, I wanted to dive into it more deeply. Yes, I’m jumping right into the minefield, so I’m going to attempt to tread lightly.

And really, it wasn’t what he said that gets under my skin. It’s things like this.

anorexic-500Guess what, it didn’t. They are all hot. This image is much better (and you should click on it because it came from a great post).

beauty

 

I’ve honestly been writing this post in my head for weeks, the FB conversation just inspired me to actually put it out there. I think it is wonderful to celebrate the very real beauty of average and larger bodies, but it is not okay to belittle smaller ones to do so.

I have certain beauty standards that I apply to myself and only to myself. I recently started getting back to the gym because, honestly, I felt fat. I’m not, never have been, but that is the lens as it applies to me. I feel most comfortable in my own skin when it’s no larger than a size 4*. I’m at my curviest** and most fit there. It’s what works for my particular frame and body type. It also happens to be where my husband finds me most attractive, and yes, that is important to me as well.

That would be an impossible standard for some and I hold no one other than myself to it. It would be absolutely ridiculous to expect someone of a wildly different body type to conform to the standards I have for myself. If your weight is adversely effecting your health or your happiness, do something about it. You have my encouragement and support.

Even if it was possible, it would deprive the world of their beauty. Because beautiful women come in all shapes and sizes. It would deprive me of their beauty. My standards are my definition of beauty for me. It is what it takes for me to find the person in the mirror beautiful. It is not what it takes for me to see another person as beautiful. Don’t ever let someone else’s standards tell you what makes the person in your mirror beautiful.

There are a lot of beautiful women in the images posted above. None of them look like me, and that is a beautiful thing.

*Dear jeans manufacturers, even at a size 4, my hips are wider than my waist and my butt is full and round. You know, like a woman. Relabeling jeans made for adolescent boys is not going to cut it. Also, I like to actually put things in my pockets so could you maybe make them more than an inch deep?

**Curvy does not equal fat; please stop using it that way.

 

The Dreaded Dressing Room

Sure you look cute and stylish going in, but the florescent box knows your secrets. Its mirror tells no lies.

image

In here, you know exactly how your butt looks in those jeans.

image

Why yes, my FN does have a rather large butt. And there is the added dread of the fashionable gunnie girl. What do you do with the pistol while trying on new pants?
image

Personally, I leave it right there in the holster on my pants, and I don’t step out of the room to use the 3-way mirror. Were I carrying IWB, I would try it with whatever pants, but the gun would never leave the holster. Because, as Tam says, “Stop touching it!”

How about you? How do you handle the dressing room?

My Beauty Routine

Ha! Like I’ve got time for some personal pampering routine.  That’s rich.

You see, I’m not a morning person and yet I like to leave the house at 7am to both beat the morning rush hour idiots and get my choice in parking spots at the office.  (I have a winter favorite and a summer favorite. Hey, I drive a black sedan.  In summer, shade is far more important than proximity to the door.) Of course, not being a morning person means I’ve got mad snooze button skills. Yo.

So I end up rolling out of bed with just exactly enough time to stumble into the bathroom for a shower. I am not actually awake at this point so routine is very important.  My early morning autopilot software hasn’t been upgraded or defragmented in years.  So it’s facial cleanser to make sure I’ve removed the make-up that I may or may not have actually bothered to apply the previous day but most certainly failed to remove the night before, wash the hair, condition the hair, wash the body, rinse and dry off. Done. (Nope, you didn’t see a mention of dealing with body hair because I rip the little buggers out by the roots on a  regular basis.)

One problem with this routine is that it is way to easy for me to skip the whole moisturize after the shower step. And I have chronically dry skin.  I could write you messages on my legs with my fingernails, dry.  Well I could, but I can’t now.

Why?

Because of this.

Dove Visible Care

It’s the new Dove Visible Care softening creme body wash with the highest concentration of their NutriumMoisture technology across the Dove product line.  Honestly, when they asked me to review it, I wondered what I might possibly have to say about a body wash.  I mean, I review things like ammo here.  But hey, I like to be clean so why not?

I have admit, seeing the ‘visibly more beautiful skin in just one week’ line made me a bit skeptical.  I mean, I’ve got pretty decent skin if I’ll take the time to take care of it.  Really, dryness is the only issue. But this stuff, it shoved that often neglected lotion applying step right into the whole get nice and clean step. Hence the reason I can’t draw pictures on my legs with my fingernails anymore.  Really, I should have taken a before and after picture because my skin even looks softer. Also, it helped sooth and speed up the healing where I had scratched my thigh raw due to mosquito bites. Total surprise there.

So here’s what they have to say about it

  • Designed to soften skin and dry spots
  • Rich, pearlescent creme format with luxurious lather and clean rinse
  • Contains a mild cleanser, glycerin and stearic acid
  • A white floral gourmand fragrance that includes an elegant combination of magnolia and pink jasmine

Soften? check. Dry spots? Check.  OMG! The lather!  I almost forgot to tell you about the lather. It’s thick.  Like soap opera languish in the tub thick.  Even with my hard water. And a little goes a long way.

OMG! Shower Picture

I was actually concerned about the smell when I got it. I don’t like perfumes, particularly overly floral ones, and this stuff smells very strong right out of the bottle.  But it rinses away nicely leaving just a soft clean smell. Honestly, the smell is neutral enough that the EvylRobot didn’t mind when I washed his back with it.

Also, it opens on the bottom.  I know this seems like a little thing, but my shower ends up littered with precariously balanced bottles because I’m cheap and I’m going to get every ounce of that stuff out. Dove was kind enough to save me from the early morning fancy footwork involved when I inevitably knock down all the other bottles.

Bottle Top

Yeah, Dove.  I see what you did there. While everything else is rolling willy nilly in the tub, there you are.  Steadfast and true.  And making sure I get every drop of those 18 ounces without attempting to defy gravity.

This being kinda sorta generally a gun blog, I was going to shoot it when I finished reviewing it. But I love it.  I can’t waste it like that.  When it’s empty, I’ll be spending some of my ill-gotten wheelbarrow of cash to buy more.  So you’re just going to have to settle for a chance at a $500 spa gift card instead (Details on the sweepstakes are at the bottom of the post).

So really, try out the new Dove Visible Care line.  It makes me feel pampered and luxurious and continue my relationship with my snooze button.

Psst. FTC-Yep, they provided product and this is a paid review. And you can kiss my nice soft ass.
Visit Dove® VisibleCare® to get a coupon for $1 off!

Enter to win one of two $500 Spafinder gift certificates!

NO PURCHASE NECESSARY

COMMENTS TO THIS POST ARE NOT SWEEPSTAKES ENTRIES. PLEASE SEE BELOW FOR ENTRY METHODS FOR THIS SWEEPSTAKES.

You may receive (2) total entries by selecting from the following entry methods:

a) Follow this link, and provide your email address and your response to the Promotion prompt

b) Tweet (public message) about this promotion; including exactly the following unique term in your tweet message: “#SweepstakesEntry”; and then visit this link to provide your email address and the URL to that Tweet.

c) Blog about this promotion, including a disclosure that you are receiving a sweepstakes entry in exchange for writing the blog post, and then visit this link to provide your email address and the URL to that post.

This giveaway is open to US Residents age
18 or older. Winners will be selected via random draw, and will be notified by e-mail. Winners will have 72 hours to claim the prize, or an alternative winner will be selected.

The Official Rules are available here.

This sweepstakes runs from 7/18/2012 – 8/22/2012

Be sure to visit the Dove® VisibleCare™ Crème Body Wash brand page on BlogHer.com where you can read other bloggers’ reviews and find more chances to win!

 

 

Goin’ On

Dear Random Dude at the gas station,

You said, “I just gotta tell ya’, before I saw the ring. I was gonna flirt. But you outta know, you got it goin’ on. Your husband is a lucky guy.”

Thanks for that. Remarkably flattering today when I was rushing home to be closer to my own bathroom rather than defile the one in the office.

Nice as the compliment was, you might think about how your actions look.  I mean, staring at a much smaller woman as she walks inside to pay.  Still being there when she comes out even though it is clear you are finished with your transaction.  If she’s observant, you’ve put her on alert.  There’s a reason I had secured my purse with my non-dominant hand.  Funny, that’s probably why you noticed my wedding ring.  Wasn’t really expecting a confrontation, but I have to say you tripped an orange there.

For all I know, you spotted the tension.  Maybe that’s why you felt compelled to explain yourself.

Honestly, I appreciate the explanation, but I still watched as you pulled out of the parking lot and got far enough away that you couldn’t see which direction I went.  I certainly appreciated the compliment. And that was delivered like a real gentleman.  Good call keeping the open door of your car between you and me there at the pumps.  I knew it was impossible for you to lunge in my direction.  Kudos to you for just delivering your line, getting in your car, and driving away.

I wish you the best of luck.  And thanks for making me smile even though I wasn’t feeling so hot.

 

Hey Honey! Foot Doctors Say I Should Own More Shoes

It’s true.  I swear. See, here’s a link. It’s a bonafide thing I read on the internet.

Also, I’m immune to this

Scientists at the University of East Anglia recently warned that high heels could be to blame for flat feet, a painful condition affecting around 15 per cent of people.

I was born with flat feet and thus, they cannot get flatter. And it isn’t painful either. It’s my superhero power.  I am Stiletto Girl.

And since I am uniquely qualified to test and evaluate high heeled shoes, I believe Prada should send me these.

pic via AutoGuide.com

I like cars.  I can drive a standard in 4inch stilettos. I wear Italian size 38. I took a home defense shotgun class in 3 inch heels.

So, Prada marketing person, email jennifer AT injennifershead DOT com so we can work out the details.