At o’dark thirty when someone is breaking in, your firearm is more important to grab than your robe. Robert E. Thompson, 91 year old WWII vet, can attest to this fact.
Robert E. Thompson jumped out of bed early Saturday when his dog starting growling and attacking the intruder. He said he got his revolver and went out back to let the guy know how he felt about home invaders.
He didn’t even notice he had failed to grab any clothing until the authorities arrived. I’m betting the perp didn’t notice either. I’m sure all he saw was muzzle. And really, what’s more embarrassing, peeing yourself when you find you’re on the wrong end of a revolver, or being stark naked on the right end?
Yeah, breaking into my house in the middle of the night would probably be a good way to see me naked. I’d like to think naked Jennifer is a memorable sight, but I’m guessing the business end of my 12 ga would trump it. And as much as I love my readers, I will not be posting pictures to test the theory.
Thing is, my bathrobe won’t stop a home invader. It really won’t protect me from anything other than a very awkward moment. In fact, the delay involved in grabbing it before my shotgun could get me killed. Or worse. Most home invaders are just after stuff. I have insurance for stuff. I’m grabbing my shotgun for the real sicko that is there for me and/or my family. If that is the case, my bathrobe wouldn’t slow him down. But as many pounds of lead that I can pump in before he falls certainly will. And the dead goblin won’t have any stories to tell about the naked lady with the shotgun.
Responding police…well I’ll probably have time to grab my robe before they get there. Might even earn a faster response to subsequent calls.