There’s a New Badge In My Sidebar

I have been thinking about doing something.  Providing a forum for victims survivors to speak out.  And then I found out someone else had already done it. There may still be something, but finding this was incredible.

This is amazing and I am in full support of the work being done here.  I’ve sat down and read many of the stories.  Every story is different and yet tragically the same.    I support anyone speaking out.  Neither the secret nor the shame belongs to the victim survivor.  There is no shame in being a victim.  If you are still here, you are a survivor.

In taking the pledge, I am saying that I will read each story as it is posted.  I intend to go further and read everything that was there before I found it.  I encourage you to do the same.

It isn’t time yet to tell my full story on the internet.  It may be years before it can be told without an anonymous tag attached.  There are other people whose safety I must consider.  My own safety is not at risk.

I have talked to several people face to face about it.  The perpetrator has even been confronted.  The tragic thing about telling people has been the fact that most people that I have told have stories of their own.  We have to talk about it.  We have to put a human face on the victims survivors.  By giving people a safe place to tell their stories where they will be heard, we take the power away from the people that hurt us.  It’s scary to talk about it.  People we love can and will reject us.  We will get blamed for it.  It helps to know that not everyone rejects us.  It helps to know that someone out there believes us and supports us.

If I could say one thing to victims survivors, it would be that no matter what anyone says, the shame isn’t yours to bear.  That’s the thing that eats you up inside.  Give it back.  Someone forced it on you, but it isn’t yours.  It’s theirs.  Don’t be silent.  Give it back.

2 thoughts on “There’s a New Badge In My Sidebar”

  1. Thank you so much for this post, and for your support of VU. I’m sorry but grateful that you “get” the need for this sacred space. Welcome to the fold, dear girl. I hope one day you can shout your story from the rooftops.

  2. Thank you Maggie.
    I will tell when I can. Understand that I don’t bear him any malice nor do I want to damage his reputation. The story I have to tell is mine. It is the story of how it changed me and the journey to become whole.
    I’m not protecting his identity out of fear. I’m not revealing it because my story isn’t about him. It’s about me and it is mine to tell.

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