When even the Elite Tactical Food Court Team 6 is laying people off.
When police arrived, Ackerman said he wanted to be put in leg shackles for their safety because his feet “were certified weapons in Nevada.”
He also claimed to hold seven college degrees and said he worked as an architectural engineer, truck driver, mixed martial artist, traveling disc jockey, phlebotomist, stuntman and sex toy engineer.
Ackerman said he worked on the three most recent “Spider-Man” movies and used his engineering expertise to design the Green Goblin’s hoverboard.
via NewsOK (RTWT)
Clearly, with that resume, he was the least qualified member of the security forces. Obviously, burning down the laundromat was the only option he had left.