Achy Breaky Lament

How Billy Ray Cyrus should have reacted

Now you’ve shown the world what happened to my girl

You’ve torn off your clothes on MTV

Now I can’t face my friends. Oh what a fool I’ve been.

Whatever happened to my little Miley


I put you on the stage when you were underage

Sold your childhood out to Disney

I should have been a dad, instead I let you be a fad

Now look what you’ve grown up to be.


My daughter’s a tart, I didn’t do my part.

I just didn’t teach her any class

And now that’s she’s a tart, It really breaks my heart

If only I had spanked her little ass


I really wasn’t going to comment. But then my brain ran off on it’s own tangent and this happened. Feel free to add verses in the comments.

4 thoughts on “Achy Breaky Lament”

  1. I let my brain run off on its own once. Haven’t seen it since.

    (alternate: I let my brain run off on its own once. That happened right after I joined the Navy. Thereafter, when running off on its own, it was often found lying in the gutter.)

  2. That really sucks. Her father could have done better, I understand he wanted to make her a Star, but I wouldn’t be surprised if I seen her in a gang bang movie porno. getting her insides re modeled. Is that mean? maybe I am too harsh here.

  3. I could mention Robin Williams, from his stint on “Mork & Mindy” to his lamentably crude stage presence. Or Don Rickles and Rodney Dangerfield and their varied performances from family-time TV to their lamentably crude Vegas acts. Or Phyllis Diller.

    It seems that once a national presence is established, the entertainment dollars of Vegas and casino performances drive entertainers to the titillating and lucrative crude fringes.

    I note that few people go to casinos for spiritually uplifting experiences.

    Miley toyed with the “healthy farm girl”, healthy family values schtick with her back-to-roots Miley movie. Now she moves on. This isn’t about family values, or healthy living, or even responsible behavior. She is an entertainer just like every actor, sports jock (Dennis Rodman, anyone?), and TV “personality”. Some get to the casino stage, others exploit other venues.

  4. Remember some ‘Why is this news?’ moment when the ‘news’ had some blip about her, and she said ‘Sex and the City’ was her favorite show.

    She was, I believe, 14 at the time.

    Figured it wasn’t going to end well.

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