Guess What? We’re All In A Movie

It’s the only reasonable explanation for what’s going on in the world. Think about it.

  • There’s a hacker with incriminating info on the United States government bunking down with an ex-KGB agent who is trying to take over the world in between his shirtless photo-ops.
  • Meanwhile, a plane straight up vanishes from the sky.
  • And a senator who has worked tirelessly to keep guns out of the hands of citizens is caught trying to illegally purchase guns from the Philippines so he can arm the Chinese crime syndicate.
  • All while half the US is caught in a seemingly endless winter that was apparently caused by global warming.

I’m going to go ahead and check upstairs for New York cop with a Beretta. I’ll take him some shoes. You guys find a ragtag group of super heroes with a fancy plane and billionaire on the squad. Bonus points if they’ve also got a God with a big freaking hammer and nice abs.

9 thoughts on “Guess What? We’re All In A Movie”

  1. The best global warming story I heard was that global warming means not a rise in temperature too slight to notice — it is a rise in energy in the weather. Thus, the Arctic Vortex at the North Pole, in milder times, would have spun off bits and chunks, and we would get a mild dose, occasionally, of arctic air meandering about the globe. With global warming, though, much larger chunks spin off, more often. Tornadoes, volcanoes, hurricanes — all gain in energy and frequency.

    The second best story is that the AR-15 is responsible for global warming, because of the way it’s bullets tear holes in the ozone.

    My runner-up favorite is that we ended global warming when we kept Gore out of the White House.

    The other global thought I entertain, is that back in the Geophysical Year, it was posited that the 1950s were the mildest decade on record, and that just plain natural cycles demand that we expect each succeeding decade since then, to become less mild than the previous decade. I note that the Amazon Rain Forest is still being razed to brew ethanol and disrupt global weather. The Asian rain forests are being razed for lumber and charcoal, and to disrupt global weather. The old forests that covered Colonial America from the Mississippi east to the Atlantic hasn’t been replaced. The ancient forests of Europe are still meager remnants of what shaped the climate for our modern world.

    We still have people enamored of the magic cure, natural gas was the last one I heard. My suggestion is not mass transit to enable continued waste, but to eliminate commutes — require employment, shopping, and residence within walking distance, about 1 to 2 miles, for all new residence and workplaces. Measure the amount of material from renovated or demolished buildings that gets re-used (saves transport, trees, etc.). Measure the amount of food, tools, clothes, toilet paper, etc. that is produced within 30 miles of where it is used. Measure and report the carbon footprint of every dollar spent by the federal government, including first and second derivative footprints (the vehicles run by the government, the home energy budget of the employee’s family enabled by the employee’s paycheck, and the portion of the taxpayer’s total energy expenditure for the year represented by all direct and indirect taxes, as well as the energy expenditure represented by the receiver spending those federal dollars).
    Brad K.´s last blog post ..Student debt — an mere extravagance, or a crippling waste of American lives?

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