Nothing Really Rhymes with Orange

Oh orange! I would write an ode in your honor were you not so aloof in alliteration, cruel in computation, vexed by verse.

You are the abusive lover always promising that you’ve changed. “It’ll be different this time, baby!” Your succulent sweetness disguising your lies.

But alas, our love was ill-fated from the start. I should have known that you’d never truly reform in spite of so many years of peace.

Some part of me will always love you, but I can’t let you hurt me anymore. The temptations of your flesh may be great, but I must be strong.

Farewell fine fruit!

-Yes, I took a bite of an orange yesterday. I know better. If only I’d been programmed with an allergy to lima beans instead. One. Stupid. Bite. It seems the absence of orange in my life has only served to increase the sensitivity. Oh well. At least I’m not allergic to bacon.

Super BitCon: Cosplayers!

As my darling husband has mentioned, we’ve been dusting off the old video game consoles and blowing out the cartridges with TeenBot. The family that stomps enemies together, stays together, right?

Anyway. So we found ourselves at the local fairgrounds this weekend, not for the fun show, but for the inaugural Super BitCon. Yes, there was geeking (so much so that I made a verb). And cosplayers! I’m no EpBot, but I did capture a few for your enjoyment.

MarioLuigi

Can’t go wrong with the classics. Although, I have to admit to being partial to the next one.

Mario

Happiest Mario ever. He was so excited when I asked him if I could take his picture that he almost forgot his hat. His sister, on the other hand

CheetahMen

Jumped right up on the planter and gave me her fierce face.

vendors

Some of the vendors got in on the costume fun.

animegirls

I don’t know who these two are supposed to be, but they are adorable. Feel free to educate me in the comments.

Tetris1

Tetris2

This guy just really wants to fit in. (You see what I did there?)

Really though, this last kid stole the show. He’s my absolute favorite.

Ash1

I give you the winner of the cosplay contest!

Ash3

Just look at the proud dad! Proof positive that geek is inherited. (We actually represented 3 generations at the Con. My dad came along for the fun.)

ETA: Here’s EvylRobot with the rest of the Cheetahman story.

Guess What? We’re All In A Movie

It’s the only reasonable explanation for what’s going on in the world. Think about it.

  • There’s a hacker with incriminating info on the United States government bunking down with an ex-KGB agent who is trying to take over the world in between his shirtless photo-ops.
  • Meanwhile, a plane straight up vanishes from the sky.
  • And a senator who has worked tirelessly to keep guns out of the hands of citizens is caught trying to illegally purchase guns from the Philippines so he can arm the Chinese crime syndicate.
  • All while half the US is caught in a seemingly endless winter that was apparently caused by global warming.

I’m going to go ahead and check upstairs for New York cop with a Beretta. I’ll take him some shoes. You guys find a ragtag group of super heroes with a fancy plane and billionaire on the squad. Bonus points if they’ve also got a God with a big freaking hammer and nice abs.

Sex, Drugs, and Hobby Lobby

I’ve been kind of paying attention to all the arguments surrounding the Hobby Lobby court case. In short, Hobby Lobby doesn’t want to pay for some forms of birth control that the owners consider contrary to their religious beliefs. The government says, not so fast. These methods of birth control are legal and since you aren’t a religious organization, you must pay for them regardless of your personal convictions.

Huh. Well isn’t that interesting? You know, I’d like a new firearm. I have every right to own a firearm. In fact, it’s a right protected right there in plain language in the constitution rather than hidden somewhere under the idea of privacy. I can’t afford a new firearm at the moment. By this logic, I should be able to compel my employer to purchase one for me. Right? Even if my employer was someone like Michael Bloomberg*.

They can’t refuse. That’d be denying me my right to own firearms. It would directly infringe on my access.

Except that, it wouldn’t. It would just mean that I have to spend my own money on it. It would be none of my boss’s business. As it should be.

Hobby Lobby cannot compel its employees not to use these forms of birth control. They cannot deny access to them. They just don’t want to subsidize it.

*Thankfully, my employer is nothing like Michael Bloomberg.

Bald Faced Idiocy

Thanks, Jay. Surely I needed the rise in blood pressure.

You clicked over, right? Good. No? Make with the clicky! I’ll wait.

Now then.

What kind of brain addled idiot suspended a 9-year-old girl from school for shaving her head in support of a friend with cancer?!?!?!?!? Are you freaking kidding me?

“I didn’t realize that hair was such an important aspect of a child at school,” Campbell said. “For a little girl to be really brave and want to shave her head in support of her friend, I thought that was a huge statement and it builds character in a child,”

In a statement to 9News.com, Catherine Norton Breman, president and Chair of the academy’s board of directors, said the dress code “was created to promote safety, uniformity, and a non-distracting environment for the school’s students. Under this policy, shaved heads are not permitted.”

Delaney said she was happy to have her friend’s support.

“It makes me sad because she was really happy to go back to school and show people what she did, but now that she didn’t get to, she’s kind of sad,” Delaney told 9News.com.

Source

Dude. Duuuuuuuuude. You made a little girl with cancer feel sorry for her friend because you are a dumbass. You fail on all the levels.

Like cockroaches, the school retreated from their position once the press shined a light on the story. Kamryn was invited to return to school today.

Let me tell you something about being a 9-year-old girl. It’s a mess of confusion and an over-whelming desire to be liked and accepted by your peers. Fitting-in is your Holy Grail. The popularity lines are being drawn and you want nothing more than to be on the right side of them. You’re starting to worry if you’re pretty enough to be one of the cool kids.

Shaving your head at this stage? Damn, girl. You are a rockstar.

There’s this idea that femininity and long hair are linked. Balking that tradition is intimidating. Ask me how I know.

punkingI didn’t really tell you how completely freaked out I was. I asked Michael to do it quickly before I chickened out. Which was a distinct possibility. There was more than a little bit of anxiety about leaving the house the next day. (Although the time saved in morning primping was nice.) Sure, I’d already told the internet, but then I had to go out into the general public. Yikes! I was 33, a long way from hitting all the levers on the hormonal soda fountain, and it was scary.

Or, I thought it was anyway. It turned out just fine and honestly quite liberating, but I didn’t know that until well past the point of no return. If and when I do it again, it won’t be so bad. No way 9-year-old Jennifer was that brave. Not a chance.

Kamryn, I salute you, and I’m praying for your friend. She’s lucky to have a friend like you.

 

They’ll Know We Are Christians By Our Love

Our love? Really? You mean, not by our cruelty towards those we believe to be sinners?

Huh.

So, who looks more like a Christian

Even after being targeted directly

And upon learning of his passing.

Funny, I first heard of the imminent demise of Fred Phelps from George Takei’s post. And I was touched. Honestly moved by the grace and mercy. I will humbly admit that had I heard it without his commentary, my reaction would have been far more along the lines of ‘good riddance’ and ‘hope it hurts’. Not especially Christian of me.

Even still, I think the world just became a better place for having lost that much hatred. It is hard for me to hope that God has mercy on his soul. I don’t want him to experience mercy! I want judgment! Hell-fire and brimstone! But that is my own failing and weakness talking. My lack of understanding. Only God knows a man’s heart.

As much as I hate the bracelets, when I ask ‘What Would Jesus Do?’, I believe that he’d act a lot like George Takei here. He would recognize the sin and show grace and mercy to the sinner.